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BoFdate 29th July 2008
"It ain't about how hard ya hit.
It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward… That's how winning
is done!" proclaimed the great political theorist Rocky Balboa. Unfortunately for Prime Minister Gordon
Brown, voters in Glasgow East last week delivered a stinging below the belt hit,
leaving Clubber Brown immobile on the canvas clutching a bruised pair of ballot
boxes. Managing to carelessly mislay a
majority of 13,507, it didn't take long before Labour backbenchers started
shouting for Brown to (wait for it, you can't rush a clichéd boxing metaphor)
throw in the towel. read more
BoFdate 14th July 2008
Is it a bird? Is it a
plane? Is a condom crossed with a hair
net with one end chopped off? No. It’s Temenos.
Fear it. Despite sounding like a
minor adversary of Doctor Who, Temenos is the first of five massive sculptures
planed for North East England’s best loved beauty spots; Middlesbrough,
Stockton, Redcar, Hartlepool and Darlington.
Or the Teesside Rivera as they are better known. By an addled tramp eating pigeons on a park
bench in Hartlepool. But Temenos is set to challenge the drug
dependent, prostitute infested, nuclear infused, culturally and intellectually retarded
image of the North East. Indeed, once
the last of the ‘The Tees Valley Giants’ has been completed, the construction team
are rumoured to be turning their attention to Chernobyl,
or ‘the glowing heart of Russia’. read more
BoFdate 10th July 2008
Whinging: if there’s one thing we can’t stand at The BoF its
hearing morons whinging and whining on about shite that you know full well they
haven’t got the brass balls to oppose when it comes down to it. Whereas we like
to present an eloquent if occasionally ill-informed rant about the issues of
the day and what we’ll do about it come the great revolution [looks at sky
whilst tapping watch], there’s a world of difference between the prolonged
spouting of hilarious rage and the feeble whinnying of some two-dimensional
fanny. And with that said, let’s have a
look at a couple of choice whingings that have caught the eye over the past few
days… read more
BoFdate 6th July 2008
Summer can be a competitive time of year. With the tedium of lengthy league competition
out of the way it’s time for the one on one, knock out thrills to begin. Happily, England were not around to get the
nation fired up into a frenzy of mediocre underachievement at Euro 2008, thus
leaving space for tennis to rouse the armchair pundit / racist xenophobe into
bilge spouting action. read more
BoFdate 3rd July 2008
Hoho, poor Andy Murray. On Monday evening: British Tennis
Hero. By Thursday evening: Scottish loser. Having seemingly enjoyed the
traditional pre-match meal of ‘sporting crumble’, Murray emerged leaded-footed before being
handed his own arse in spectacular fashion. To be fair, no-one with even a
passing interest in furry yellow balls expected Murray to win. Nadal and Federer, like Geena
Davis and that shemale with the big shoulders, are in a league of their own.
They might as well break away from the ATP and, in conjunction with some
privately financed human cloning company, create some sort of…anyway, they’re
better than all the rest. read more
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